HippoThoughts

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UPDATE: Buzzfeed Quiz Making Man Question Career Now

AMARILLO, TX—It has recently come to the attention of HippoThoughts that there have been several updates in the home of Tommy Gilders. Last we heard from Tommy he had left his wife, Tammy, and created a Match.com profile. The last Buzzfeed quiz Tommy took told him he would marry a total of 10 times. In something that many will call a miracle, Tommy is on to wife #4. However, Tommy recently took a new Buzzfeed quiz (against doctors orders) and is now questioning his career choice.

Tommy, as we know, is a 27 year old man formally married to “the absolute love of his life”, Tammy. More investigative reporting has determined that Tommy is a mid-level sales manager at a company that specializes in selling parrots to people in need of parrots. Tommy gave the following statement about his career choice:

“All my life I knew I wanted to work in the parrot industry. It’s an often misunderstood and unfairly critiqued profession. So many people need parrots and so many people don’t know how to get parrots. This is where my outfit comes in. You Need Parrots, We Got Parrots specializes in selling parrots to people who need parrots. That’s why our tagline is also the name of our company. I love my job. I can’t see myself doing anything else.”

Unfortunately for Tommy the new Buzzfeed Quiz titled, “Choose Unicorn Meals and We’ll Tell You What Job You Have”, revealed Tommy is actually a food blogger. Tommy has reported knowing nothing about food and was “completely shocked” when he saw the results.

Tommy taking the Buzzfeed quiz

“I couldn’t believe it. A food blogger? I am a food blogger? I always thought I was destined to be a mid-level sales manager at You Need Parrots, We Got Parrots. But alas, I was not. I need to pursue my actual dream of being a food blogger at once!”

Tommy has since quit his job and started a food blog. The blog thus far has not been successful and Tommy has become depressed and in enormous debt. HippoThoughts will be sure to check in on Tommy again soon.


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