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Untouched Mini Muffins Become Main Focus Of Meeting

STAMFORD, CT—During the weekly status meeting at the Stamford branch of a company that sells bottled chicken, everyone’s focus shifted from quarterly sales to an untouched basket of mini muffins. Chicken Bottles™ has been in business for almost 1/8th of a year and has a branch in Stamford, Connecticut. They are also headquartered in Stamford and don’t have branches anywhere else. Rumors that Jeffrey wants to start a branch in Bridgeport have surfaced, but sales do not support it at this time.

The Chicken Bottles™ weekly status meeting goes from 10:00am to 10:03am. The HippoThoughts investigation team has determined they discuss status in this meeting. During the status meeting this week, Rachel from Human Resources brought in a basket of mini muffins. One employee at Chicken Bottles™ gave the following statement:

“As soon as she walked in with the muffins we all began to stare. Nothing this exciting has ever happened at this branch”

One witness in the meeting explained that after the mini muffins were brought in, it was virtually impossible to focus on anything else.

“Once the mini muffins were brought in, it was virtually impossible to focus on anything else.”

Due to the developing game of chicken, the weekly status meeting lasted until 10:15am that day—twelve minutes longer than usual. Eventually, Rachel had realized what she had done to her co-workers. This is when she decided to put an end to it once and for all. At around 10:13am, she grabbed the mini muffins and one by one jammed them down her co-workers throats until they choked.

In an unrelated story, Chicken Bottles™, out of Stamford, CT, is hiring in all departments with the exception of HR. Please reach out to Rachel for more details.

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